So I haven't talked much about PCOS on here and tonight I'm really feeling like it needs to be talked about. So I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and it's a giant pain in the rear end. Not only do I have mood swings galore if I don't take my birth control pills, but I'm also pretty much guaranteed to get Diabetes, and at higher risk of Uterine Cancer and Breast Cancer and umpteen other different bad things. On top of all these long term side effects I get to deal with ones that are everyday occurrences that quite frequently people make fun of me for. I have basically the beginnings of a beard of I don't shave it, and chest hair and all sorts of other crap that I don't want to deal with.
Now what brought this up tonight for me is that my boyfriend is coming to see me in 10 days. Now I've explained to him about PCOS and some of the things that happen because of it, but there's a distinct difference between telling someone and them seeing it. So I'm sitting here going "Great, wonderful, not only do I have to worry about zits and other normal girl stuff I have to worry about shaving my face!" It really made me want to cry when I started thinking about it. And I know if he can't accept that I have a few more physical quirks than a normal fat girl then he's not for me, but...
Grrrr, it just seems like I get screwed when I was born. I have three older sisters, of whom only one has PCOS. But she doesn't have the same issues I do. She is a size 10-12 doesn't have hair in the wrong places and looks gorgeous on top of only having to take birth control to deal with her PCOS. Now the other two...again size 10-12 gorgeous and societies version of pretty outside of model thin. So yeah whenever I think about standing beside them I cringe or want to cry. I want to scream why me.
You know intellectually I've excepted the fact that I'm going to have issues my entire life, but it's just not fair. Why am I the one that got all the bad crap when the lot of them just waltz through life?
So needless to say tonight hasn't been a good night. I can't seem to find anything really positive, and of course I get to look forward to my sister's wedding in a few months. Wonderful, I get to spend Christmas in a corner by myself while everyone else has fun and enjoys themselves. I hate weddings and I hate that I feel like I have to make up for the fact that I have PCOS because obviously I did something wrong to deserve it.
Sweets, I need to challenge a few of your beliefs on PCOS.
ReplyDeleteYou are NOT guaranteed to get diabetes or any form of cancer, heart disease or high blood pressure. These are not symptoms of PCOS, these are things that have been connected with being fat, which is now being challenged by a lot of the medical profession. Telling us that because we have PCOS, we are fat, therefore we need to lose weight or we will DIEEEEEEEE is one of the age old tactics of the medical profession to try to scare the obesity out of us.
There IS a correlation between obesity and these medical conditions, but obesity is not a causation. Which means that while fat people may have a higher rate of these things, that higher rate is not CAUSED by their fatness. Instead, it is starting to be seen that those of us who are fat are more likely to get sick because we're too afraid to go to the doctor because we'll be ridiculed, or because we don't have an active life because we get bullied when we do.
PCOS is not a death sentence, nor is it the end of all the good things in life. I do know it is sold to us as "Lose weight you PCOS fatty or you will DIE!" by the medical profession and a lot of the PCOS community (the biggest PCOS site in the world is the worst for this).
What we do need to do is approach our health totally independant of our weight. If it's any help, Google "Health at Any Size" and you'll get lots of really good information.
And as for the bloke... stand tall, keep your head high and demand that any man treat you with respect and honour... and they will.
Big hugs girl!
Kath
But I read in a book on PCOS that 50% of women with PCOS get diabetes and as my father is diabetic I'm at an even higher risk than that. *suddenly kicks the medical profession* Jerks, I should know by now that 90% of medical professionals are money grubbing bastards who need a good kick someplace extremely sensitive.
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